Today I got a letter in the mail, not to “Patrick Daly”, but “To A Friend”. An interesting label. Before I noticed that, though, I was stuck trying to figure out the message written on the envelope.

“This very old church loans this to you, to bless someone connected with this home. Then it must go to another family that desires God’s blessings. See letter inside…YOUR HOME FIRST!”

At first I couldn’t even understand what it meant, “This very old church loans this to you.” What? What does a church being “very old” have anything to do with anything?

So I opened it up and the first thing I saw was this folded image of Jesus. I thought it was funny that this church was sending out posters. Then I read the bottom. Of course, it’s a rug, not a poster. Duh. A paper rug…

At the bottom there it says:

“Look into Jesus’ Eyes and you will see they are closed. But as you continue to look you will see His eyes opening and looking back into your eyes. Then go and be alone and kneel on this Rug of Faith or touch it to both knees. Then please check your needs on our letter to you. Please return this Prayer Rug. Do not keep it.”

Emphasis is mine. Like they’re really going to take these wrinkled posters rugs and re-mail them.

By now I’m fully sucked in and I’m ready to return the rug and get my free cross. Wait. No, I’m not.

To even further convince me that the sicko’s mailing this stuff are crazy, I opened up this page:

“Please do not open these prophecies until after you have placed your prayer page (page two of our letter to you) and the prayer rug back in the mail before sunset tomorrow or the next day. God will help you do this. You will see…”

After seriously considering the spiritual consequences of opening the letter, I was overcome by my desire to open the Willy Wonka Prophecy Bar in hopes of finding the Golden Ticket.

What I found might shock and astonish you:

Well, I guess it isn’t all that amazing. I found out that I, “cannot be happy with life unchanged,” and that I need to, “discover the ways to use this power,” (a power to speak blessings into my own life).

Another page included a Prayer Order Form, listing the following as options:

• My Soul
• A Closer Walk With Jesus
• A Better Job
• A New Car
• A Money Blessing
• Pray for God to bless me with this amount of money: $_____________

There were, again, reminders that it was very important to send the Prayer Rug back so others can use it.

Of course, in the end, everything is about money.

You too can be blessed with $10,000 or a Big 6 Room House.

So in the end I was pretty worked up and found myself perplexed by the type of people that can actually produce these materials and prey on people (pun intended).

From the things I’ve learned about user interface, design, and marketing — these guys are awesome. They use every technique and they do it well. That makes it all the more scary. People are actually participating this scam and it really does make me sad to know that the victims of hoaxes like these are searching for something; it’s not the money though. These people’s hearts are broken and have been beaten down by the world so much that they’ll believe these offers.

Pray for the victims of these blasphemous scams and pray for the people hosting them.